


Please

by poly_pr1nce



Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: Additional Warnings Apply, Additional Warnings In Author's Note, Eating Disorders, Flashbacks, M/M, Panic Attacks, tw
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-22
Updated: 2018-05-22
Packaged: 2019-05-10 04:10:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,457
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14729696
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/poly_pr1nce/pseuds/poly_pr1nce
Summary: Andrew has a flashback to the foster brother he stayed with when he was 7, and talks to Neil about itAlternatively: FUCK ALL YOUR HEARTS





	Please

**Author's Note:**

> So this is like a Part Two type thing of a post @markonasurface wrote on Tumblr so yeah
> 
> TW for: R*PE MENT., ED! ANDREW, FLASHBACKS, PANIC ATTACKS, PAST ABUSE CONVERSATION TYPE THING, GENERAL HEART SHATTERING SHIT THAT SHOULD BE A GIVEN WITH THIS FUCKING HEART-HUNGRY FANDOM *

Neil lead Andrew outside, the other man holding tight to Neil’s side the entire way. It was surreal - Andrew always made sure to be so independent, so seemingly distanced, and now he was clinging to Neil like a frightened child.

They made their way across the car park, but as Neil began to walk them towards Fox Tower, Andrew began pulling in another direction. Neil let him lead them towards his car. But when they reached it, Andrew made no move to let go of Neil or to get in. After a few seconds, Neil reached forward and opened the passenger side door.

“Can you get in alright?” he asked lowly.

Andrew nodded stiffly, climbing into his car slowly, only letting go of Neil at the last possible second. Moving as quickly as he could, Neil shut the door and made his way around the the driver’s side, sliding in and closing the door. Almost as soon as he was in the car, Andrew gripped his hand again, almost twisting it.

“Hey,” he said. “I’m not leaving you. Not unless you tell me to.”

Andrew didn’t reply, but his grip loosened slightly, so Neil took yest as a possitive.

He put the car into gear, driving out the car park and then away from Fox Tower. He didn’t need to ask where they were going - there was only one place he knew Andrew felt 100% safe and secure, and that was his house.

The entire drive there, Andrew was silent. Neil worried he was lost in the past, lost in the memories of what that man had done to him, but Andrew never let go of Neil’s hand, so Neil assumed he was trying to ground himself in the present.

 

..

 

When they reached the house in Colombia, Neil parked in the drive, but niether man moved.

“Drew?” Neil asked. “Are you ok to get out the car?” After a few seconds, Andrew nodded, stiffly moving to open his door, again only letting go of Neil at the last second. When he did, Neil got out his side and met Andrew on the passenger side.

Again, Andrew clung to Neil’s side as they made their way up the path and into the house. Neil turned each light on as they passed it, as Andrew lead them up towards the bedroom.

When they got there, Andrew locked the door behind them, only then letting go of Neil. Neil watched as Andrew rested his hands over the lock, before he rested his forehead against the door.

“'Drew?” Neil tried not to let his voice shake. He had never seen Andrew like this; normally it was Andrew soothing Neil during a meltdown.

About a minute and a half later, Andrew moved so his back was against the door as he looked around the room.

After what felt like an eternity, Andrew looked at Neil. For the first time since seeing him on that couch with the others, Neil knew Andrew was seeing him, not looking past him or around him.

“'Drew?”

“Neil.” Andrew’s voice was stronger than earlier, but it still wasn’t his usual one.

“Talk to me,” Neil said slowly, trying to keep his voice even.

“It was him,” Andrew said after a few seconds. “He was my foster brother for four months when I was seven.”

_When I was seven._

Neil’s heart sank. He had hoped his guess had been wrong.

“He was so nice, I thought that home would be different,” Andrew was saying. “The parents were shit but he seemed really understanding and gentle, he gave me his old books, bought me movies, let me play dress up in his clothes.” Andrew laughed ironically, choking on a sob - it was such a painful sound Neil’s heart broke.

“It was the third time he was babysitting me alone - his parents had gone out to the cinema or something and wouldn’t be back for hours. The first two times they had left, he had let me pick out movies and we stayed on that couch the whole time.”

Neil gulped because he knew what was coming next. Andrew’s voice shook, silent tears rolling down his cheeks. But Neil didn’t dare interrupt him or tell him to stop.

“So when he told me to come down to the den and stay on the sofa I didn’t think it was odd. He shut the door behind me like he had the other two times. It was only when he started getting undressed that I realised something was wrong. But I still didn’t get how wrong - a few of my foster fathers had taken their shirts off before hitting me, so I just thought he was going to hit me and that would be it.”

Andrew shook his head, and Neil watched in horror as a cynical smile spread across Andrew’s face.

“He told me to get undressed so I did - I knew from the others that the beating was always worse if I tried to fight. So I didn’t- I did everything he said. It was only when he-” Andrew cut himself off sharply, breathing shallow as he continued, voice breaking as he spoke. “When he got on top and started that I tried to tell him to stop. I told him no, I told him to stop.” By now Andrew was baring his teeth, almost growling. “I begged him. And he told me if I said please he would. So I said it, over and over and over again. But he didn’t. He just laughed, told me I wasn’t saying it loud or clear enough, that it didn’t count, that he couldn’t hear me.”

Andrew was beginning to shake but Neil knew better than to touch him when he was like this.

“After, he carried me up to the shower and locked me in there while he cleaned up the sofa. He came back up and made sure to get rid of the blood, told me if I told anyone that he would do it again.”

Andrew laughed again. “I kept quiet and he went back to being nice and charming. I only stayed there another month - the parents noticed my behaviour change, decided I was too much hassle because I didn’t want to be left alone with him anymore and wouldn’t tell them why. They sent me off, but not before he told me he had lots of friends who would do the same thing to me if I ever told someone about him. So I didn’t.”

Andrew sighed. “Six months later I found out he’d gotten arrested. One of the other children wasn’t so quiet, screamed so much the neighbors heard and called the police - when they got there he hadn’t cleaned up.”

Neil could feel himself crying silently. Andrew hadn’t deserved that, hadn’t deserved any of it.

Slowly, Andrew slid down the door until he was siting on the floor. Carefully, Neil edged towards him, squatting down on his haunches next to the other man, who seemed so small and fragile all of a sudden, shoulders heaving and body shaking as he cried.

Neil stayed there next to Andrew, utterly silent, for almost five minutes before he slowly began to speak.

“I’m sorry. You didn’t deserve that, you didn’t deserve any of it. And he doesn’t deserve to be out of prison. But he’s in California, he can’t and won’t hurt you again.”

Andrew’s shaking slowed and he turned his head to look at Neil but otherwise didn’t move.

“I’m here, and you’re safe,” Neil said. “I promise.”

Slowly, Andrew nodded, leaning his head back against the door. After a few seconds, he looked at Neil again.

“Yes or no?”

“Yes.”

Andrew crawled towards Neil, before reaching out and running his hands over Neil’s arms and chest.

Neil stayed there, keeping his breathing even.

 

..

 

Three hours later, they had moved to lying on the floor, Andrew curled up against Neil’s side, Neil’s hand in his hair, gently carding through the feathery blondeness.

Andrew’s stomach rumbled.

“Hey,” Neil said at last, voice barely a whisper. “Do you want anything to eat?”

But Andrew shook his head. Neil felt torn - he knew Andrew used to starve himself when he was scared, just like he used to make himself sick when he was stressed. But he had kicked that habit in rehab.

Neil knew better than to ask “are you sure” after Andrew said “no”, especially when he was in this state.

But at the same time, he knew Andrew had to eat. Then again, he thought, surely missing one meal would be alright?

So he stayed there with Andrew, not saying anything.

..

It was another seven hours before they moved, and another two after that before they ate anything.


End file.
